Where the Hell….? Condom Chris

It would appear Chris is taking a safety first attitude towards all those Halloween ghoulies that are out and about at this time of year. Protected to the max he strutted into our games as part of the latest event to hit our Quahog’s, The Hauntening.

But haven’t we seen this latex lad somewhere before? Yes we have, Condom Chris made his debut in the Family Guy episode Quagmire’s Quagmire, (Series 12, Episode 3).

This episode will snag your attention as it’s the episode where Quagmire thinks he’s found his perfect woman, only to discover in this relationship he’s certainly not the boss. Sonya not only puts the D in Dominatrix but also the P in Paranoid but Quagmire is besotted. The two lovebirds embark on a truly wild whirlwind romance, which is way too X-Rated to talk about on this PG site, but it’s not long before Peter and Joe start to worry that Quagmire is out of his depth in the increasingly violent relationship.

Quagmire whilst sharing a beer with the boys admits they are right and that Sonya might just be too hot for even him to handle. But little does he know the wrath this confession will bring down on him, as his very own little bunny boiler has bugged The Clam and is listening to every word. Not one to give up on getting her own way she abducts Quagmire as he leaves the bar and he wakes to find himself tied up and trapped in a storage container. Guess he should actually think himself  lucky as by time most folk end up in a storage container they’re usually dead. However his torment doesn’t last a lifetime, unfortunately, as he’s eventually rescued by his old reliable drinking buddies and it’s not long before he’s giggity strutting to singledom once again.

But Quagmire isn’t the only resident of Quahog riding an emotional roller coaster during this episode as Lois unwittingly creates havoc in Stewie’s life when she comes across Oscar, his very first love, I mean teddy bear, in the attic.

At first Stewie lives up to his evil reputation and ignores Oscar, acting like he doesn’t exist, but inside he’s torn and it’s not long before he gives into his sentimental side, (it’s tiny but it’s there, a bit like the Grinch’s heart), and invites Oscar for tea. He’s horrified when his secret play date is interrupted by Brian and begs him not to tell Rupert of his betrayal.

However it’s not long before Stewie decides to stick with his first love, Oscar, and Rupert is cast aside. Brian decides to take advantage of Rupert’s loneliness by showing him some, err, doggy attention, but he is caught in the act by a horrified Stewie who demands Rupert makes his choice, it’s Brian or him. When Rupert falls in Stewie’s direction he takes this as a sign Rupert and he are meant to be. Stewie heads to the attic to break the news to Oscar only to find his first love has hung himself. Guess he won’t be going to Stewie’s next teddy bears picnic.

So how on earth does Condom Chris fit into all this love and betrayal, well if you’d allow me to rewind for a minute I will explain.

Remember I talked about Lois being in the attic? Well she wasn’t alone, Chris was there too helping her sort through boxes of Halloween decorations, and as they look through things they start to reminisce about the previous Halloween when Chris dressed up as, yes you guessed it, a condom. We’re then treated to a funny flashback where we see Chris in his costume trick or treating Quagmire, only for Quagmire to say to him, “What the hell are you supposed to be?”

And after that short scene Condom Chris was gone, never to be seen again until TinyCo brought him to our games recently.

So there you have it, now you know exactly where the hell you’ve seen Condom Chris before. Do you remember this episode? Or maybe you’ve never seen it. If so do you now plan to watch it? And for those who have seen it can you tell me where Quagmire and Sonya met?

~ Russian Tigger