Where the Hell….? Jim Kaplan

Meet Jim Kaplan, the wide guy with the even wider smile. And believe me when I say he’s got more personas than Peter has character costumes, and every one of them comes with a scam to match. His knack of finding gullible folk to sell to has earned him the nickname of “The Salesman” and believe me if he’s selling, you shouldn’t be buying. You want to keep your clams close now he’s wandering our Quahog’s.

Jim Kaplan appeared in our games as part of the Best of 2016 event  but where have we seen this shady character before? Well in the Family Guy TV show of course. He’s actually made quite a few appearances starting as far back as Season 2, so join me on a journey down memory lane as we stroll through Jim Kaplan and his many appearances in Family Guy.


I Am Peter, Hear Me Roar – Season 2, Episode 8

Looks like some luck has dropped right onto Spooner Street, as all the residents receive letters telling them they’ve won a boat and a time-share. Sounds too good to be true doesn’t it? But hey, it’s seemingly the real deal and the residents all head to a seminar to claim their prizes. And guess who’s waiting for them, yes it’s Jim Kaplan, and he’s found an easy target to con. Can you guess who?  Yup you guessed it, Peter.

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In little to no time he talks Peter into giving up his share of the prize for a shot at the mystery box. And just like many of the mystery boxes that appear in our games, it’s full of booby prizes and that’s exactly what Peter gets when he “wins” 2 tickets to the Chuckle Bucket Comedy Club. However Jim’s efforts to con the rest of the residents to go for the mystery box ends in failure but just like a certain hulk of metal, I’m sure he’ll be back!!!


There’s Something About Paulie – Season 2, Episode 16

And as promised, Jim’s back, the smiles the same but the names not, as he’s now calling himself Doug, and is a used car salesman.  And surprise, surprise, once again his prime targets to con are the Griffins.

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As Peter & Lois wander the car lot, Doug goes into full salesman mode, trying to tempt Peter with a car that’s, well, as Lois points out, has a cardboard steering wheel and no engine. Although to be fair it does come with a drawing of one. However despite Lois’ anger, Doug still tries to hook Peter in by telling him its had one previous owner. And we all know Doug would have sealed the deal if Lois hadn’t come along for the ride that day.


A Fish Out Of Water – Season 3, Episode 10

Feeling fat and fed up Peter hatches on a plan to become a fisherman, as you do. And our Jim is the man who can make Peter’s dreams come true, as Jim’s bank, known locally as, well, Jim’s Bank is willing to fund a remortgage on the Griffin family home to the tune of $50,000.

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Peter still hasn’t worked out Jim can’t be trusted, in fact he doesn’t even notice Jim’s Bank is also home to Jim’s Tattoo Parlour. Poor Peter, if he’d been more vigilant he may have got a free tattoo to go with the bag of cash that almost cost his family their home.

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Ready Willing and Disabled – Season 3, Episode 15

And here he is again, this time as a desperate sport agent who’s willing to do anything to get potential clients to sign on the dotted lines, there’s nothing he won’t do to get that pen put to paper. And he’s got a new client in mind, Joe, who’s just been coached by Peter to a  gold medal at the Special People’s Games. And he’s willing to give Joe not only the shirt off his back, but also the pants off his behind to sign with him. Joe falls for the patter leaving Peter out in the cold once again.


When You Wish Upon A Weinstein – Season 3, Episode 22

Knock, Knock. Who’s there? Well, it’s none other than Jim come calling on Peter Griffin. And he’s in super salesman mode, massaging Peter’s ego just the way he likes it. But as soon as he’s got a foot in the door, he’s on a mission to sell, sell, sell. And what does he think gullible Peter needs, well volcano insurance as Quahog is definitely overdue one. Peter agrees and purchases the policy.

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However Peter’s about to find out volcanoes aren’t the only thing at risk of an eruption as Lois blows her top when she hears what he’s spent their money on now and demands Peter go get their money back.


Model Misbehavior – Season 4, Episode 10

Jim’s back, with a new idea and a new con, a Pyramid Scheme called “Cash$cam”.

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And this time it’s not the head of the Griffin household that’s involved, but the baby. Yes, Stewie becomes involved with the scheme to earn some extra pocket-money and he ropes in Brian as his underdog, I mean employee, as Brian needs to make some quick bucks to take care of an embarrassing worm problem.

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Bango Was His Name – Season 4, Episode 29

Here we see him selling yet another product, and yes of course it’s to Peter, this time it’s a TIVO box

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Hell Comes To Quahog – Season 5, Episode 3

The Griffins are back at the car lot, this time shopping for Meg, and of course our now familiar smiling salesman is waiting to pounce. It’s not long before he’s sold Meg on a Sedan.

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But Peter’s spotted something a little bigger for his daughter, a tank! Yes readers, you did read that right, I said a tank. And before we know it Jim has jumped on that stray thought of Peter’s and is sealing the deal, telling Peter the tank will protect Meg from short-range missiles. I guess with everyone hating Meg, that sales patter strikes a chord with Peter and lo and behold he buys the tank. It isn’t exactly hard work conning Peter is it?

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No Meals On Wheels – Season 5, Episode 14

Jim’s back in business, this time in a second-hand shop. And you can guess who wanders in hoping to bag a bargain. Yup, you guessed it again, Peter. Before long Jim has sold Peter a rather fetching set of red flannel feet pyjamas.

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And if that wasn’t enough to be taking home to Lois, Peter only goes and buys himself a half-finished colouring book.

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And just when you think Peter can’t get any stupider he hands Jim a blank cheque to pay for it all.


Trading Places – Season 9, Episode 13

Here we find him running a contest where the winner can win a dirt bike.


A Lot Going On Upstairs – Season 14, Episode 15

The opening credits give us the glimpse of our favourite con man in this episode, after Stewie messes up in the intro, he finds himself benched, and who’s amongst the cast joining him there, well none other than Jim Kaplan.

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So there you have, Jim Kaplan and his cons. Do you remember any of these episodes? Or have you never seen them? Do you now plan to watch any of them?

~ Russian Tigger
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2 responses to “Where the Hell….? Jim Kaplan

  1. Sorry to be way off topic here but has anyone ever put a character on a task and had it finish super early? Put Mr Miyagi on a 10 hour and Adam West on an 8 hour and both finished in less than 2 hours. Thought this had happened before but this is the first time I know for sure was way early.

    Like

    • I vaguely remember this happening to me a long time ago, can’t remember what event it was during or that and it’s never happened in my game again since.

      Like

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